A Quiet Word About Invisible Illnesses & Mental Health.

0 0

Halloo,

I know from experience how hard it is to get someone in distress to open-up and tell you what is wrong. I have been on both sides of the table. The journeys of mental health and all other invisible illnesses are always hard, really hard.

I also know that to be supportive you will really need to be patient, persistent, and kind. Something difficult to do if you are not that invested in the relationship with the person. Please don’t give up easily.

It is even harder because you can‘t see what is wrong. I know. There is no broken arms, head in bandages, swollen eyes, or legs covered in stitches for you to see and be reminded of the discomfort the person must be in. All you see is someone who looks perfectly normal but refusing to do normal things. It goes way beyond that, trust me.

Invisible illnesses and Mental health are so hard to recognize that even medical professionals overlook it sometimes. This is what drove many sufferers over the edge. I spent years running from pillars to posts in great pains getting no concrete answer from anyone.

I know from my own experience that the years of not knowing what is wrong is more harrowing than now that I have a name for what is going on. When someone knows what they are dealing with, they can seek help, recognize and deal with their symptoms and feelings. Knowing that you can start treating your problems is a huge relief.

It is incredibly hard to explain to anybody how hard things are; when you can’t even explain it to yourself. Explaining any form of health problems is hard, but invisible illnesses are particularly hard to explain because people can’t see it, they generally tend to misunderstand and the person suffering will have to constantly defend themselves.

How can anyone not feel frustrated or depressed when you are constantly down. Being misunderstood comes with the territory. I wish it isn’t. Many people shied away from telling their family members and friends because of fear of rejection or being considered a liability. That is not mentioning the people that just think you are just lazy.

Apart from anger, sadness, loneliness, we have to deal with coping with a new lifestyle because of limitations, lost dreams, hopes, and aspirations. These are really dark times for people like me. That is why many people in my shoes realize sometimes no friends is better than some callous friends. Doors will close in your face in miraculous ways.

Contrary to many people’s opinion it is not always easy to talk about the problems in one’s life, especially when it’s still ongoing. Nothing can be better than a shared story to be listened to attentively with kindness, respect, and generosity.

It is not rocket science, ask someone with your body, heart, and soul how they are really doing. Expect resistance but please persist. When the person finally opened up please LISTEN. That is how to support. Don’t be eager to offer solutions. Listen and ask genuine questions. Let the person tell you how and what is needed from you.

I was once told that the problem is in my head, that I was imagining it. The sad part is I even considered it to be true briefly. I was that desperate for answers. I mean how do you think someone living with constant pain feels when your way of helping is by telling them they are imagining it, they are not really sick or to push through the pain? You are making the situation worse. the suffering is real, not in their minds.

This is a major life disruption for many. Learning new ways and changing how we think and deal with things. You don’t just say I want to get over it and it becomes so. It is a painstakingly gradual process like a child learning to walk. Not an easy thing to talk about I assure you.

I am not going to pretend to be the old me, no. I am embracing who I am now. I respect who I was before all these. And I am making room for a new me to emerge when it’s ready.

Anybody you see struggling with an invisible illness or any form of mental health is not necessarily a failure, worthless, or weak. They are fighting a war you do not see. They want the same thing as everyone else. HAPPINESS, SECURITY, COMFORT, UNDERSTANDING, AFFECTION, HOPE, & RELIEF.

Please, let me here your thoughts in the comment section below. I will also appreciate your support by liking and sharing this post. Thanks a lot.

Stay with me,

Ruka

About Post Author

Ruka

My name is Ruka. Born and bred in Nigeria. Now living in Ireland. I am a Woman, Feminist, Wife, Mother, Muslim, Black, and African. I am an Entrepreneur who also works in Finance Administration. I am a Fibromyalgia & Chronic Pain Warrior. I love writing and hope to make a name for myself doing it.

rukaganiyu5@gmail.com

https://www.rukasplace.com

Happy

0 0 %

Sad

0 0 %

Excited

0 0 %

Sleepy

0 0 %

Angry

0 0 %

Surprise

0 0 %