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Halloo,

The easiest thing these days is to tell someone to SEEK HELP when we see them struggling or they told us of their struggles.

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Let me say this to you, asking a person suffering to seek help and giving advice on where to get help on their health issues is admirable and a very good thing to do. BUT. Did you know that THIS HELP STARTS WITH YOU?

Yes, it does.

The immediate relief that can be achieved because of your support through active listening, touch, hugs, love, reassurance that you are there is the beginning of HELP!

Imagine a person who is already feeling like a burden, being surrounded by people who feel duty-bound to find help for her? No one actually listening to her.

Invisible illness does not signify stupidity. People who suffer from it know that you are not trained to provide medical care. But you can give abundant love, kindness, and above all LISTEN!

Imagine at the most vulnerable time in your life, the only person you have to talk to is eager and desperate to leave and solve more urgent matter elsewhere?

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They will rather talk about getting the best care that money can buy for you. Your heart will break many times over, thinking of how alone you are in the world. Nobody should feel that way, Nobody.

Sometimes the best cure costs nothing, just by being surrounded with people who want to be there. People who are physically, mentally, and wholeheartedly present.

Chronic Illness is tough enough without being surrounded by people who have emotionally checked out on you. It is worse than being alone.

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Please, Please, Please never let anybody close to you feel like they have nobody to talk to. It is a very harrowing experience.

Don’t be one of those people who always have suggestions, advice, information for people suffering from invisible illnesses but never take concrete action or stop to LISTEN!

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Stop telling people with invisible Illnesses to keep praying. Believe me, most of them are doing that already. Be of help by helping them get through day to day activities with care and respect. Chat with them. Walk with them. Respect them. Do fun things together.

Make them feel like a person. Make them understand you are hanging out with them because you want to, not because you have to.

Don’t be one of those people who ask ‘How can I help?’ and when the person suffering responds with what he or she needs, you never deliver. You start making excuses. It is a double rejection for the suffering person. Offer help if you truly want to help, please.

Thanks a lot for reading. Please, your contributions to this post will be appreciated in the comment section below. Help by clicking like, and share with your friends. Also, don’t forget to join other subscribers to receive notifications of new posts by email. I appreciate it.

Stay with me,

Ruka

Stay with me,

Ruka

About Post Author

Ruka

My name is Ruka. Born and bred in Nigeria. Now living in Ireland. I am a Woman, Feminist, Wife, Mother, Muslim, Black, and African. I am an Entrepreneur who also works in Finance Administration. I am a Fibromyalgia & Chronic Pain Warrior. I love writing and hope to make a name for myself doing it.
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13 thoughts on “Help Starts With You!

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